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I hate my job. I’m so unlucky. It’s not fair. I should be… I wish I was more… I’m so tired. I can’t cope. I can’t stick to anything. Why does it have to be so hard?
When you talk (both to yourself and to others), are you choosing language that helps or hinders your happiness?
In celebration of World Happiness Day, we’ve come up with 5 fixes to help you talk yourself into feeling more positive.
Drop the word “should” from your vocabulary
“Should” is a destructive word. Every time you say “should” you’re saying “I am not enough”. So drop it. Use “could” instead – “could” gives you back your power by giving you a choice.
Use positive self-talk
Many sports psychologists report that positive self-talk (“I’m amazing.” “I can do this”) is associated with better athletic performance, impacting on an athlete’s self-confidence, anxiety control, mindset, concentration and mood. Luckily, this also works for people who don’t wear Lycra...
Act, think and talk like a child
Have you ever noticed how most young kids don’t waste time on self-doubt? They often tell themselves they’re amazing (and “cool”, and “awesome” and “epic”). Don’t wait for someone else to tell you how awesome you are. Tell your awesome self.
Use positive affirmations Pick one thing that’s challenging you, look in the mirror and make a positive statement about it (out loud). Maybe you feel overwhelmed? Say “I am grateful that I am in demand,” or “I take on tasks with energy and enthusiasm.” Too much? Why not simply “I am perfect exactly as I am”? Do it once a day for a week. You might feel silly for the first couple of days and then it’ll start to feel good.
Choose who you talk to Negativity is contagious. When someone shoots you down with negative words, remember it’s usually their issue, not yours. Surround yourself with people who empower you with encouragement and loving words. Sometimes discussing your problems with someone impartial can really help. If you’re struggling with consistent feelings of unhappiness, Connect Health & Community’s confidential counselling services are open to everyone. Call 03 9575 5333 to find out more.
Negative language and self-talk can easily become a long-term habit. But by being aware of the way you use words and language, you can take steps to break the habit and talk yourself happier.
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